Transformation, Truth, and Authenticity
Poet Adrienne Rich defined love this way: “An honorable human relationship – that is, one in which two people have the right to use the word “love” – is a process… delicate… and often terrifying to both persons involved, a process of refining the truths they can tell each other. It is important to do […]
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How to Create a Healthy, Vibrant Relationship Without Couples Therapy
Don’t you wish there was a class to take in high school or college that taught you how to be a good partner in your intimate relationship? That your parents talked more openly and taught you more about what constitutes healthy, sexual relationships? And that your parents modeled how to effectively resolve conflict by how […]
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The Multi-Faceted Aspects of Unconditional Love
Last week my only daughter got married. And it was a joyous and love-filled experience for me. I was on cloud nine as I participated in the wedding day. A big part of my joy was in witnessing family, friends, and community express much love for my daughter and her husband. Hello Grief After she […]
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How to Bring Up Couples Therapy with Your Partner (6 Dos and Don’ts)
Picture this: You and your partner are about to take off for a lovely romantic weekend away together. As you both are getting ready, a recurring issue surfaces between you. Before you know it, you both are arguing, angry, hurt, and feeling misunderstood. You find yourself having second thoughts about your “lovely romantic weekend”. Silence […]
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Men of Integrity: How to Create Lives of Acceptance, Love, and Peace
Photo courtesy of 123RF. altanaka/123RF Men Of Integrity I am married to a good man. Together we raised four boys who have become good men. My daughter is about to marry a good man. And by “good”, I mean men of integrity; men who respect others and who are kind; men who strive to live […]
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Transform Grief and Loss: How to Create a Life and Marriage that Thrives
In my last post, “How to Reclaim Your Life and Strengthen Your Marriage” I mentioned that part of the reclamation process is grieving what was lost. In this post, I want to explore more deeply what this means and what this looks like. Little Deaths; Being Abandoned. When we live for some time abandoning ourselves […]
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Rain, Stillness and the Power of Connection
Spring Season Pacific Northwest Style I am sitting on the couch with a fire going in the wood burning stove and the steady fall of rain outside my windows. Welcome to the spring season in the Pacific Northwest. As the sky drops more and more rain, the world becomes greener and brighter. In the 24 […]
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How to Reclaim Your Life and Strengthen Your Marriage
When I was 24 years old and preparing to marry, my aunt, who was a wise and strong woman, gave me a small, glass ballerina. I had studied ballet while growing up. And since I lived just outside of New York City, I was influenced by the world-renown ballet companies right outside my doorstep and […]
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Three or More Better than Two? A Critique of Megyn Kelly’s approach to consensual non-monogamy
Can we just take a very important pause here to think consciously and intentionally about Megyn Kelly’s interviews about consensual non-monogamy on her March 1st show? Sexism Revealed As a couples therapist who often works with clients who are wrestling with the challenges of monogamy, and/or the challenges of consensual non-monogamy, I was so taken […]
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Love Stories
Two weeks ago, my daughter came into town to shop for her wedding dress. We carefully planned our day and the places we would shop. Our first stop was a beautiful vintage shop in Ballard. http://trovevintage.blogspot.com/ The salesperson took us to their back room where their vintage wedding dresses were stored. As we entered, I […]
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